티스토리 뷰

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Things that keep me going

아임밤톨 2025. 6. 8. 22:33

There is nothing in this world that is guaranteed.
The moment we take things for granted, we lose the ability to feel grateful.
No matter how much we possess, manage, or influence,
a life without gratitude is a life without happiness.
We are not happy because of what we own or where we stand, but to the extent we feel grateful.


How to breathe well
The life of a whale is divided into times when it holds its breath and when it surfaces to breathe.
Humans are the same.
We need to know how to endure when we must, and rest when we can, to live well in the vast sea of life.
But some people can’t endure when they should, and force themselves to endure when they shouldn’t.
That’s when illness finds its way into the body and mind.
We need the wisdom to recognize whether now is the time to hold on, or the time to surface for a breath.
We need to breathe to regain the strength to endure.
If we keep holding on endlessly, we may end up collapsing.
The same applies in the sea of family life, work, and society.
We need the wisdom and courage to manage this balance.


A small hill to lean on
When a storm hits and the roots of a flower are exposed, it will die if left unattended.
You must gently support it with a small stone,
and carefully cover the exposed roots with soft soil so the flower can live again.
It is the same when pain enters life.
If someone tries to forcefully pull us back up, we may be unable to rise at all.
But if there is a small, quiet presence like a stone we can lean on,
and someone who gently covers our wounds with care, we can take root again.
If you fall, ask for help and accept it.
And if someone else falls, if you have the strength, be a quiet shoulder they can lean on,
and gently soothe their wounds.
Life is not grand.
It is about being small hills for one another to lean on.


To those who are too tense
In busy and hectic days, we often don’t realize how tense and strained our bodies are.
It’s okay to make mistakes sometimes.
If you are holding on too tightly, it’s okay to let go.
Only those who have held someone’s hand can reach out their own.
Protecting your own life is what matters most.


Time you do not need to live in a rush
Even during times when you don’t need to be busy, living as if you are being chased is a problem.
You need time to release the tension in your body and recharge.
If you always live on edge, you may not have the strength left to protect yourself when it really matters.
For those who live under high tension and constant pressure, this is even more important.
So at least when falling asleep, or even just before going to sleep,
practice letting go of tension little by little.
In that time, practice setting aside worries, regrets, and concerns.


You must understand in order to love
It doesn’t make sense to say you can love someone without understanding them.
Once you understand, the same actions you once resented look different.
Behaviors that used to make you angry may suddenly seem sad.
Behaviors that seemed ridiculous may start to look pitiful.
The most important thing is to understand the life you have lived.
And ask yourself whether you want to continue living that way.


To protect your heart from breaking
You need to know where your limits are — how far you can go and where you must stop.
You need to constantly check the stress and pressure building up from work, goals, and relationships.
Set checkpoints to check whether you are still safe or approaching danger.
If you ignore this, your heart may break one day, and so may your relationships.


The real reason we drink coffee
We endure through daily life, through work, through relationships.
To do so, we need time to breathe.
Breathing means finding space and freedom for yourself.
Drinking a cup of coffee or tea, taking a walk —
these moments help us live healthily.
Leisure is about finding space to breathe and pockets of life where you can relax.
Find places, people, or moments where your body and mind can rest.
Earning money and pursuing self-improvement are important,
but it is just as important to consciously create time to breathe.
In the gaps of your life, find your own coffee.


If flowers no longer look beautiful
Flowers appear beautiful when you have flowers blooming inside you.
If you want to know what flowers are blooming in your heart,
explore many different gardens.
You cannot truly know what you love or feel passion for until you experience it.


Are you still weary despite working hard?
Even if no one is there to welcome you,
offer warm encouragement to yourself.
Feed yourself well, give yourself good things, and comfort yourself for enduring life.
That alone gives you strength to live another day.
An old diver once told a younger one:
Only hold your breath as long as you can.
To hold your breath well, you must first breathe well.
Come up for air now and then.
It’s okay to be a little selfish.
Healthy self-care leads to better care for others.
Don’t keep forcing yourself — live while taking your own breaths.


Don’t pretend to be okay or not tired
When life is hard, what you need is not pride, but help.
If you know you need help, allow yourself to experience it.
If you don’t live as you think, you will end up thinking as you live. — Paul Bourget
When we do things we love, we truly rest.
Live a life where you can say:
Ah, this feels good — with places, people, and things you love.


If you want to live a new life, you must gradually refuse the old one.


Things that can only be seen through love
Humans are like trees.
The deeper a tree’s roots grow in one place, the harder it is to transplant it.
Just because we are born human doesn’t mean we naturally understand the beauty and richness of life.
It is only when we live with affection and love for life that we begin to truly experience its beauty and depth.

Nothing in life is guaranteed.
Live with gratitude and love.
Reflect on whether you have helped someone, whether you have done something good for the world,
and keep putting down roots in that spirit.
Receive help from others gladly,
and share the energy you gain with the world.

When we have dreams and wishes, life is more likely to flow in that direction.
What we truly desire may not come true all at once,
but if we keep placing our heart and love in that direction,
life will surely take us to a better place.
If you love, you will eventually make it happen.


Can you be happy whether things go well or not?
Sometimes, even when you are doing your best, it feels like the world is not helping — it may even seem like it’s getting in the way.
But is that really failure or an obstacle?
When grilling meat, you don’t flip it until one side is fully cooked.
In life too — when things feel flipped or disrupted,
don’t get stuck on that fact alone.
The universe may be preparing the next step in your life.
It may be cooking your life to the perfect temperature and timing.
Learn to work happily, and rest happily — that is a lifelong task.


Patience and perseverance
When you plant a young tree, after two years it begins to bear its first fruit.
But those first fruits must all be removed.
If left, the tree won’t grow strong — it will lose energy.
A young tree needs time to put down strong roots.
If you leave small fruits too soon, the tree won’t produce good quality fruit later, and it will grow weak.
So in the first few years, all the fruit is pruned to help the tree build strength.
It takes five, even seven years to finally harvest good fruit.

Don’t be impatient.
If you think of a new endeavor as a tree,
trying to harvest fruit right away is foolish.
Let the roots grow strong first.
Even if small fruits appear in the first or second year,
have the wisdom and courage to prune them away.
Above all, we need patience and perseverance.


What are you protecting as you live?
Protect your purity.
There is a difference between being naive and being pure.
Naivety is innocence without awareness of the world.
Purity is wisdom held together with a kind heart.
I sincerely hope that those who preserve purity, values, convictions, and their inner voice will succeed.
If you do nothing, nothing will happen.


Do it even if you are afraid. Don’t try to do it big.
Don’t try to be perfect.
Start small.
Do it while making mistakes.


Signs you have found something you love

  1. You focus on it deeply.
  2. You do it repeatedly.
  3. You think about it even when you are away from it.
    If something draws this kind of love and attention from you, it is something you truly care about.

Our profession is not our identity
Ask yourself: What do I want?
What do I find meaningful?
What sparks my curiosity?
What draws my focus?
And for what am I willing to pay the price, no matter what?
These things bring us closer to our true selves.
Become a person who moves a little closer to your authentic self each day.


The plateau of life
There are three stages of life:

  1. A period of passion
  2. A period of boredom
  3. A period of maturity

The deeper the passion, the deeper the boredom that follows.
What once held meaning may no longer feel meaningful.
But what matters is not what you achieve — it’s whether you continue to have things you want.
Without “I want,” life stops feeling alive.


Things that can only be seen in darkness
In a pitch-dark theater, the way to sense light is to close your eyes.
It sounds paradoxical, doesn’t it?
We think we must open our eyes wide to see.
But if you force your eyes open to fight the darkness, you only become more tired and frustrated.
When life grows dark, close your eyes for a while.
Let the aperture of your heart open,
and in time you will see the path forward.


If you want to face and overcome your trauma
Trauma lives deep within us and surfaces when we must make important decisions.
When life goes wrong or we hit a wall, trauma triggers familiar reactions.
We each show unique responses.
In those moments, tell yourself:
It’s okay not to run anymore.
It’s okay not to hide anymore.
It’s okay to step out now.


If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.


When to endure and when not to
Don’t endure unnecessary pain.
But don’t live a life where you cannot tolerate even the smallest discomfort —
such a life will leave you endlessly adrift.


Meeting someone to love
This doesn’t happen easily or by chance.
It happens when you commit, persevere through many mistakes,
and endure both the effort and the pain required.


Those who have laughed can truly laugh
If you can laugh like a child even as an adult,
that is something truly special.


It’s okay to be imperfect, a little clumsy, to fail
Think of failures in life as tuition you pay for learning.
Learn to live with your imperfect self as you are.
If you are lacking, be okay with being a little lacking.
Build the strength to live with that.


As a parent, don’t try to shield your child from all winds
Don’t try to be a perfect parent.
It’s okay to be a little clumsy.
Give your child room to make mistakes.
The greatest gift a parent can give is this belief:
Even if I fail or make mistakes, I still have someone on my side.


The 21-Day Rule (for change)
According to American plastic surgeon Maxwell Maltz (author of Psycho-Cybernetics),
it takes 21 days for the human brain to adapt to change.
If there is someone at work or in life who troubles you,
for 21 days, treat them as if they were an honored guest.
You can choose the time frame.
If nothing changes after that —
that is the right time to let go of the relationship, or to leave that environment.
That is the safest time to move on.


Be kind to yourself
Do nice things for yourself, not to please others or because someone is watching,
but simply because you value yourself.


Understanding the masks we wear
We often wear these three masks:

  1. A bright, cheerful mask
  2. A fierce, intimidating mask
  3. A blank, expressionless mask

Don’t avoid taking time to ask yourself:
How am I really feeling?
How should I handle my insecurities?
How do I treat my wounds and self-esteem?

You don’t always have to act strong when you’re struggling.
You don’t always have to act cheerful when you feel down.
You don’t always have to pretend you aren’t hurt.
It’s okay to show the weak, imperfect face behind your mask to someone sometimes.


What does it take to have true authority?
You don’t gain real authority by speaking harshly, using your position, rank, or age.
True authority comes from competence and from loving others.
That is how your advice and comfort carry weight.
Those who give respect receive respect.


When I treat myself poorly
People who can’t speak up and constantly accommodate others become like the joints and discs of the world —
absorbing every shock.
But when you go too far, that disc bursts.
The nerves become compressed and pain begins.
That is how we end up with injuries to the heart and soul.

You lose the will to live, to eat, to be with people.
You don’t even say you’re in pain, for fear of annoying others or getting hurt by their reactions.

So stop trying to please everyone.
Don’t try too hard to be the "good person."
Learn to live in a way that is comfortable for you.

Ask yourself:
How did I come this far?
How do I relate to others?
And most importantly — how do I treat myself?


Have you ever been forgiven?
People who can forgive the flaws and mistakes of others
are often those who have, at least once, experienced true kindness or forgiveness themselves.
Just as only those who have been loved can truly love.


What is love?
Love is sharing the burdens of life with someone else.
It matters whether someone suits you, whether your personalities fit.
But just as important is this:
Do you have the willingness, the resolve, and the heart to share their burdens with them?
Discovering this — that is the journey of a relationship.


Good relationships
Good relationships last even without a clear purpose.
You enjoy even the small, everyday conversations and moments together.
There is no need for tension or a special reason — the relationship simply continues.

In communication, what matters is not wisdom or knowledge,
but politeness, kindness, and a warm gaze.

Love without manners is the most violent form of love.


The role of a parent = a cheerleader
What a child needs to learn is not which path is safest,
but that they are the ones who must choose their path and walk it.
They must stand on their own and take ownership of their life.
A parent’s role is to help them build that strength.

Say this to them:
It’s okay to make mistakes.
I’m here to help you.
Even if you fail, you are precious.


Maintaining healthy distance
In relationships, appropriate distance is crucial.
You need to be healthy and whole yourself,
so you can stand strong on your own —
only then can you build healthy relationships with others.


If you’ve lost someone you love
Among all kinds of partings,
losing a family member is the most shocking and hardest to overcome.
Don’t try to overcome it too quickly.
Grief is a sign of respect for those we loved.

The Indigenous peoples of North America say:
A person truly dies when they are forgotten.

The difficult emotions you are feeling now will not last forever.
But try to remember your loved one well, and
gather the strength to hold that love and longing in your heart.


How to move beyond grief
Grief fades when you meet someone who grieves with you even more deeply than you do.
Grief is a kind of vibration.
When your vibration of grief meets someone else’s sincere, compassionate vibration,
it creates peace.
Even if only for a moment, it allows you to deeply heal and see beyond your grief.

When grief comes, it is important to face it fully.
If you don’t go through this process, bigger problems may arise later.


You become the people you meet
Have good encounters.
Do the work that you love.


Life is precious because it is finite.